Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Enjoy the rest of your journey Mike...


Addiction and tobacco companies SUCK!

Monday, December 30, 2013

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Still trying to figure out the IT...

As it gets closer to the New Year, I’m feeling some pressure to find the IT. Here’s what I know so far:


1. I want to be a superhero.
2. If I can’t be a superhero, I’d like to be a Samurai…or a better yet, a Ronin.
3. I have always been fascinated with martial arts.
4. My knees hurt.
5. Yoga is cool.
6. Yoga studios are not cool. They smell like dirty socks and farts.
7. I seem to have a small issue with commitment or failure, I’m not sure which.
8. Tai Chi is interesting to me.
9. I seem to spend a lot of time thinking about IT or food.

I decided I’d look for a Tai Chi class. I consulted my Internets; Yelp, specifically. I found one. There wasn’t much information other than the dude’s name, Sifu Mao. No website, either. There was one review that said I could email for information so I did. Here’s what I wrote:

From: KDallmann@presidiotrust.gov
To: kcmaoqi@hotmail.com
Subject: The Most Balanced Tai Chi...
Date: Thu, 26 Dec 2013 23:11:41 +0000

Hi there. I saw your review on Yelp. Before I call and set something up, can you tell me something about Sifu Mao’s classes? I see they are private. Where do the classes take place? Does he give classes in the evenings? I am 51 and have osteoarthritis in my knee. I’m looking for more flexibility and hopefully a little strengthening. Thanks.

Okay, I get my first question was a little broad, but KC Mao’s reply was kind of snotty…

Let answer your questions one by one:

What are "something about Sifu Mao's classes" you are looking for? if you read reviews fully, you could get a general idea.

Classes take places in different locations, depends on students preferences and where they live and if the classes location is suitable.

Since lessons are private, classes in the evenings is possible.

Classes of Tai Chi plus his special Chi Gong are good for knee osteoarthritis.

Yes, you'll feel more flexibility and strengthening within a short time, as all other students felt that way, if you read their reviews.

Thanks.

I downloaded a Tai Chi app on my phone. I’ll give that a whirl and go from there.

Well, as much as I loved Nom Nom Mary, I needed to eat something else. Since Don’t-Make-Me-Eat-Livah-Poppy isn’t around, I decided I’d make some happy liver…

I sautéed onions, garlic and mushroom in some bacon fat. Then I tossed in the liver.


I also had some sauerkraut that I rinsed and then bathed in happy beef broth for a few hours. Then I threw that on top of the liver. Darn tasty!


Time to go eat something and think about IT.

Later!

Friday, December 27, 2013

'Tis the season...

For change…Let’s see. She’s-a-Travelin-Woman-Poppy left this past Monday for Wichita. I would leave the day after Christmas to meet up with her and the rest of the gang. From there, we would head to Madison, WI to meet up with pals of Poppy’s who I’d met over the summer. We were very excited about a snowy vacation…and that’s where things change.

Poppy’s Uncle has taken very ill so the whole crew has packed up from Kansas and is now in San Antonio, Texas. Uncle’s Daughter, Autumn flew out from England. Yeah, it’s that bad. So, the Madison part of our vacation was cancelled and I figured it would probably be better if I stayed home so here I am. I don’t guess Mi-Poppy will be back until later next week. Rough time for them, but at least they will all be together.

P.S., If you smoke, quit! And get you’re goddamn blood pressure checked.

Anyway, I decided I would try to do a low-carb Christmas dinner, so I bought my favorite turkey, Mary’s Organic Free Range turkey. If you’ve not had one, get one. The best turkey I’ve ever had and well worth the extra $$.

I figured I’d cook up Mary in the Nom Nom style so that’s what I did. Here’s Nom Nom Mary:


I wanted to make Mom’s stuffing, but I didn’t want to use white bread, so I bought some gluten free bread. The ingredients in the GF bread are different from other breads. There’s rice flour and some other junk. So I went about drying my bread cubes the other day and then made the stuffing.

Also on le menu was low-carb cranberry sauce. For this, I put two oranges in my Nutri-Bullet and pulverized the crap out of them. Added that to those boiling cranberries along with some Zevia cola. Figured that would work for the sugar, plus the stuff in Zevia is all natural…even has nutmeg in it. It still was a wee tart, so I added the Stevia drops. Winner, winner Nom Nom Mary’s turkey dinner!

As for the stuffing, it was okay but the texture was like eating a sponge and the GF didn’t agree with my tummy at all.

Today I had my own “It’s a Wonderful Life” moment…Jax and I went to the beach this morning. We were up on the promenade and I saw a young couple with two boys. Dad appeared to be in his undies or a Speedo. Oh man, now he’s taking off his shirt and heading to the water, while the little woman is taking video of him chest pumping and trying to look all Charles Atlas-ie.

I’m watching this, the surfer dudes are watching this and Daddy is going further out in the surf. Shit! Those of us who live here all know that Ocean Beach has a terrible reputation for the rip tide current thing, not to mention, there is a SEVER BEACH HAZARD in effect, which includes sneaker waves, big surf and those darn rip currents. Aw jeez! I’ve got my good running shoes on that I just hate getting sand in, but I can tell this just won’t end well if I just stand there. So, Jax and I go walking down to the wife and boys. I say “Are you from around here?” She says in her sick fwench accent “No.” I tell her about the severe beach hazard so she starts yelling at Daddy-o to get out. I go on my merry way.

Just so you know I wasn’t joking about the waves and such:



Are you digging my "noir" effect? I forgot I had it on.


Okay, time to go help an old lady cross the street…

Happy New Year!

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Correction!

So on my last post about the gonads in my feet, um, according to Smarty-Pants-Poppy, I evidently have a set of them gonads, but they are actually my oval-ries. Why, I didn't realize that the term "gonad" is intersexed and refers to a sex gland...male or female. I guess that means I'm still a girly. But on the way home last night when Professor-Poppy was esplaining the history of the gonad to me, she turned it into one of those stoopid mathematical analogy things…Gonads are to testis as ovaries are to feet, or something like that.  Okay, if Unsuspecting-Johnny had a $1.32 and a huge set of gonads, how many balls can he buy from Farmer Bill?  If Slutty-Sally had only one oval-ry, how many eggs will she drop on Unsuspecting-Johnny's balls on the way home from Farmer Bill's?

I tell ya, I was more confused after Masters-and-Johnson-Poppy esplained it to me, than I was the day before when I thought I was a boy.
There you go.

Saturday, November 30, 2013

It's all about the feets!

So I was sitting here the other morning having my coffee and saw Neighbor-Chan taking his walk up and down the street. First few passes, he was wearing sandals. On the next pass, he was barefoot. This whole neighborhood fascinates me that way. I love watching how the Asian folks exercise. Hand clapping, walking barefoot, swinging arms and hips side to side. You know it has a benefit, cause even the elders do it too.


Shortly after watching Neighbor-Chan take his morning constitutional, I got the little dog and took her to the beach. Me luvs me some beach. Sure was pretty too. So, then I thought, I’m close enough to the water where if I took my shoes off, I wouldn’t step on any rusty nails or hypodermic needles. So, that’s what I did. I’m trying to figure out the health benefit of walking in my bare feet. Would I find more of a benefit if I walked on the street like Neighbor-Chan? I do know that in foot reflexology the secret to good health is in the feet…if I step in dog pooh, what will that do to the health of my feet?

Since my shoes are the color of sand, I figured I needed to put them by a marker so I’d be able to find them on my way back home. There was a log, so I put them by the log.

More on that later…

As the little dog and I walked, we saw this gal doing her yoga. She was doing handstands and planks, etc. This Yoga-Gal was really flexible. I wanted to go up and talk to her about her yoga practice, but then I thought she’s probably mantra-ing and zen-ing so I didn’t want to interrupt her.

As Yoga-Gal finished her routine and then took her hair out of her ponytail and headed to the water…then she and her matchy-matchy yoga outfit walked into the surf. Now, I’m kind of worried. Who does that? It reminded me of some movie scene where the person walks into the water and disappears forever.



So, I keep watching as she keeps walking further out. How can this be relaxing, you know that water is freezing cold! Aw geez, now her matchy-matchy yoga tights are wet…now she’s submerged her whole body in the water. Now, I’m doing my Scooby-Doo imitation “Rut-Row” wondering if she’s going to end it all. I mean, it is Ocean Beach after all; some scary riptides out there.  I mean, Jax is even doing the Lassie thing..."What's the matter girl, is Timmy stuck in the well?"



Then Yoga-Gal pops out of the water and makes her way to shore. Puts her hair back in the ponytail and disappears.

Hmmm.

Well, in our travels down the beach I had emailed Sleeping-Beauty twice to come on down cause it was so pretty and the waves were huge…and to bring me some damn coffee! I figured it was after 10:00 so she must be up by now, right? Wrong…I found a place to sit down and sent Sandman-Poppy another email. Then Jax started to shiver so I figured it was time to go home.

So yeah, as I’m walking back, I can’t see that log. I thought maybe it was hidden by a little sand dune or a pile of hypodermic needles, but no, it wasn’t.

Here’s the log…or should I say that old lady's freakin tea table!


It’s probably half a football field from where I thought it was…and where F are my shoes you flexible, healthy old bag?? Too bad Jax doesn’t know “Find my shoes.” Guess I'm gonna get to feel just how healthy it is to walk barefoot on asphalt!


Yeah, I finally found my shoes. But I did walk home barefoot just in case it would make me more healthy. About halfway home I stepped on a rock. Damn that hurt! According to the reflexology foot map, the shooting pains I was feeling are located in my Gonads. You know, I’ve always wondered if I were intersexed. Guess that answers that question, doesn’t it?

Okay, so the plan for the day was to head to the Castro so Poindexter-Poppy could get her hairs cut. Here’s how that went…




I KNOW, RIGHT? This cut was meant for Depression-Era-Poppy! The gig was she wore her hair this way long before I met her. She used to have it maintained by a Barber so that’s where we went…to Louis’ Barber Shop. Introvert-Poppy was feeling kind of nervous and wanted me to be her “Hair Advocate”. So to break the ice when we walked in, I looked at both of the Barbers (Cameron and Steve) and said “I’d like the Jennifer Aniston, can you do that?” They both kind of stuttered…and then I told them I was joshing. Steve said something about not having done anything like that since he was in cosmetology school.

As Cameron worked his magic, the guy sitting next to me said “I didn’t realize she was getting that much cut off! Oh, this is going to be fun to watch!”

A fun time was had by all!

Chow!

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

GSTV...Seriously?!

It's been going on for a while, but when I was at the gas station today it really started bugging me. Gas Station T.V.


Why do we need Gas Station T.V.? All it did was get me all confused when I was trying to answer all the questions just to be able to pump the gas. I put the credit card strip in facing the wrong way, I punched in the wrong zip code cause I couldn't hear the beeping of the thing accepting each number. By the way, our zip code is now 94111116. I pressed the “yes” button for a receipt. I didn’t want a receipt, but Mr. Gas-Station-TV-Anchor-Guy’s rambling totally threw me off my game.

Then, once I’d finished and was putting on my gloves and stuff, guess what I hear from Mr.-Gas-Station-TV-Anchor-Guy say? “Don’t forget to come inside and check out our fall line of snacks and beverages!” For real? I had no idea that snacks and beverages had a season; did you?

Well, Thanksgiving is just about here.


Thanksgiving, scooter-style!

Again, like past years, I went in search of plain bread cubes for Mom’s Stuffing recipe. Again, I came up empty-handed…so like last year, I’m making my own cube-ees:


It feels kind of rednecky, but it works so well. That thar dehumidifier makes rock-hard bread cubes in a matter of hours!

The other day I took the little dog to the beach. Check it out:


Art can be such a subjective thing, right? So now I’m wondering, who or what do you think made this? A child? A serial killer? A wicked-smart seagull?

If it were a child, I’d give him /her points for composition, but definitely think they need therapy. If it were a serial killer; what are you doing out of prison? If it were a seagull, I’m not walking on that beach anymore!

This little girl just loves her mama! Okay, she just wants the food that mama is playing with to fall on the floor…


Later!

Friday, November 22, 2013

Let's talk about Cat...

I know I’m supposed to talk about food, but we’ve been on the soup diet, so I’ve got nothing to share.

Instead, I thought I’d talk about Cat. Generally, I find Cat to be somewhat annoying. That’s probably because I’m a control freak and when I want something, I want it now. I don’t think I should have to wait for Cat to feel like paying attention to me. I also don’t think that Cat should be able to crawl all over me when I don’t want Cat to do that…and then Cat wants to crawl on me even more.

In Cat’s defense, when I had an apartment, having Cat was nice cause I lived alone and Cat was a companion…of sorts.

Now that I’m a homo-owner, we now have Jax. Jax comes when I call. Jax lets me pet her tummy whenever I want. Jax never scratches me. Jax never misses the catbox. Jax doesn’t barf hairballs on the carpet. Jax is Dog! Well, we still have Cat. One Cat in particular; that would be our aging little girl, Roger.

Roger was originally Poppy’s Cat. She was very standoffish towards me, but over time, I won her over and now she loves me, in her own special Cat way.

Now that Roger is a Senior-Citizen-Cat, she’s getting a little senile. She would walk around the house in the middle of the night meowing very loud. So, we finally had to move her to the garage. Don’t worry; she gets the run of the house and backyard during the day.

Anyway, the point I’m trying to get make is that we set her up with a heated bed on top of the dryer. She loved it…for a while, but then decided she didn’t. We’d find her sitting on the cold washer. We felt bad cause it seemed that’s where she would sleep all night long…Until, one day; I was doing laundry and found her in the laundry basket. So we set her up with her own laundry basket.


She was good there until I rearranged the blankies, then she stopped sleeping there and went back to the washer. Then we thought, well, maybe she’s warm. But she’s pretty much skin and bones so she’s got to be cold. Then we set her up with the heated bed and this pillow thing…


Nope, not working. Now, how much more time will be spent trying to figure out what will make Cat happy? Well, as much time as it takes, I guess.

Then a few weeks ago, we couldn’t find her. I should also mention she’s deaf so won’t come out of wherever she is, even if we yell her name.

So, guess where I found her sleeping now?’


Yeah, my tool bag! That can’t be comfy, but she seems to love it, so I’m not making any adjustments to make it better for her. Why? Because she is Cat!

Now, check out Evee:


I don’t think Evee cares where or when she sleeps. She is Puppy!


And her parents:


Such the handsome couple. I still can’t believe Nephew is all grown up and having sex and stuff. It was just yesterday he was a baby and I was babysitting him; how he cried when I got his little chest skin caught in the zipper of his sleeper…and how he pooped the color chartreuse after I fed him blueberries.

Good times!

Thursday, November 21, 2013

The Death of Toothy Carpenter...

At least that’s what we thought. Let me esplain…Some years back, Periodontal-Poppy had a root canal and crown put on her back molar (aka, second molar…not the third cause that’s your wisdom tooth). I guess, oh, about six months ago, it started giving her some trouble. After an infection, another root canal and a bunch of other stuff, it still hurts. The dentist let Prophylaxis-Poppy know that if it kept bothering her, she’d lose Toothy.


While we were on vacation a few weeks ago, Endodontic-Poppy was still having pain, so she called the doc and made the appointment to have Toothy removed. That appointment was yesterday.

At around 11:30 yesterday I got an email from Abscess-Poppy that said “Man, I feel like I’m going to a funeral.”

Yeah, now I’ve got coffee and whatever else coming out my nose cause I’m laughing so hard. I mean, how am I supposed to respond to that without being the insensagive person that I am? I email my friend, JOZ (who had this very same procedure two weeks ago) and tell her what Sad-Sack-Poppy said. JOZ’s response “Tell her I’m sorry for her loss!”

I respond back to Pitiful-Poppy and I say “Sweetie, it’s just a tooth…we’ll have a memorial when I get home.”

So now I’m thinking about the impact that Toothy is having on my girl and my mind starts to wander. You know, I’ve wanted to write a book so now I’m thinking…

Toothy Carpenter, a Memoir.

Toothy Carpenter, I Took A Bite Out Of Life.

Toothy Carpenter, Eat Me!

Or I thought about a poem that started “The death of a tooth…”

I asked Depression-Era-Poppy if she was bringing home the tooth. She said “Hell yes, it’s gold!”

So what else could I do?  Yeah, I made Toothy a coffin.



Now, I can’t help myself and I get carried away…I said there would be a memorial when I got home.



Oh, there was soup too!




Then I get an email from False-Alarm-Poppy that said “I’m on my way home and I still have my tooth!” I respond “WHAT??” Seriously, flowers, a card, chocolate, a coffin and soup and she still has her freakin tooth! WTF? I’ll yank that thing out myself.

So she gets home and sees the elaborate shrine/memorial stuff and says “Can I still open the card?”


GOD-DUH!!

But look how happy Novacaine-Poppy is...it's as if Toothy has been given a second chance at life.

May the road rise up to meet Toothy.
May the wind be always at Toothy’s back.
May the sun shine warm upon Toothy’s face;
the rains fall soft upon Toothy’s fields
and until we meet again,
may Dog hold Toothy in the palm of her paw.


Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Who wants to go on an Adventcha?

Well, Adventcha-Poppy and I do! So that’s what we did. Here’s the gig…I might have mentioned in a previous posts that Fatass had quit drinking…again, so she’s been trying to figure out how to function in the real world without the drink.

Oh, I should probably mention that I don’t consider my working life the real world, so I never imbibed while typing away…Okay, I did once after one of our Crabby-Admin-Parties, but after I tripped and fell over in BK’s office FFM told BK she would drive me home.

Oh, oh…I guess I’ll mention too that I really don’t consider myself a full-fledged-raging-alcoholic; just maybe an alcoholic-lite. I mean, I’ve never drunk dialed anyone or woke up nekked in someone else’s bed (I’m sure Poppy appreciates that). I don’t think I’ve blacked out…but what is blacking out, really? Is not remembering the night before or not remembering how you got home considered blacking out? I don’t think so; I call that middle-age!

Where was I? Right, the Adventcha…Adventcha-Poppy and I set out exploring on Sunday. First we stopped at Devil’s Tooth Bakery. It’s our newish neighborhood bakery. Just so you know Sundays are ben-YAY day! I have no idea how to spell ben-YAY and my nifty spellcheck doesn’t catch it so I can’t even look it up on my Internets. So, it will now be known as Ben-Yay…unless I go to New Orleans, then I’ll learn how to spell it.

We sat out front at Devil’s Tooth for a few hours Hipster-watching. If you are a Hipster and you are reading this, you probably know that skinny jeans and Nike Frees are totally in!

Also, being that it was Ben-YAY! day, all the man-Hipsters had powdered sugar finger prints on the butt of their skinny black jeans and all the lady-Hipsters had powdered sugar finger prints on their black leggings with their knee-high boots. So uncool! I don’t know how many times I had to say “Excuse me Hipster, but you have white shit all over your ass!”

After Kate and Reese, two child-Hipsters, were done playing with Jax-The-Goodwill-Ambassadress, it was time for Mommy-Hipster and Daddy-Hipster to take the Lil-Hipsters home. Poor Lil-Hipsters too; I asked them if they had a doggie at home and Kate said they had a fake dog at home and it barks. Just like a Hipster to have a fake dog…posers!

Since we were having so much Hipster-fun, we decided to have a day of people watching, so we took our little Goodwill-Ambassadress home and then BrokenHipster-Poppy and I gimped on MUNI. We got off at Castro for a little Gay-Hipster people watching and then decided we’d walk over to the Mission for more people watching and then some dinner.



Evidently, those Hipsters that were at the coffee place earlier decided they’d all go to the Mission. I’m not sure, maybe that’s where they live cause I’ll tell you, they’ve taken over the Mission. Used to be back in the day when you tripped on the sidewalk, it was because there was a homeless guy lying on the ground, now it’s because there’s a stroller with quadruplets and a fake dog sitting in the middle of the sidewalk.

We went into a Hipster kid store:



I guess hunting fake stuffed animals is the new Hipster sport.

After a little window shopping, Parched-Poppy and I stopped into the Lexington to wet our whistles. The Lex is one of two Lesbian bars in town. It’s mostly Angry-Lesbian-Hipsters, which are a completely different animal than your Run-Of-The-Mill-Hipster. Yes, they wear skinny jeans and Nike Frees, but they are way cooler…kind of James Dean like, really.

Why are there only a couple Lesbian bars in town? Well, unlike BrokenHipster-Poppy and me, most Lesbians are at home, in their cargo shorts, with their two dogs and three cats doing home improvements.

Now it was time to find a Hipster dinner spot. So many choices…We ended up at Locanda. NOM!! Like, who cares if we were the oldest ones in the place? Dude, like, the food was awesome! Pork belly jerky, radishes with anchovy butter and…



Okay, he was really pretty before we ate him up.

By this time, I was ready to bust out of my skinny jeans, plus, it was a Sunday night and it was 8:30 so time for BrokenHipster-Poppy and I to make our way home to our cargo shorts, little dog and cat.

The end.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Tis the season...again!

I really don't mind the holidays.  I kind of look forward to them, but I think that's just cause I have some farbricated memory of roasting chestnuts on an open fire with Jack Frost nipping at my nose.  Who is Jack Frost anyway?  Freakin pedophile!  And who are these folks dressed up like Eskimos? This isn't Alaska...we don't even get snow.  They probably have whale blubber for their holiday dinners for Christ sakes!  Speaking of Christ, isn't Christ(mas) about the little dude's birthday?  Why is he nekked and not dressed up like an Eskimo? Is Christ really his legal last name? Jesus Christ.  What's his middle name? NMN, that's what it is!

Got me to thinking so I checked my internets for extremely accurate renditions of the nativity scene.


This would look real if it weren't plastic.  That guy on the right, is that Jesus?  If so, who's the little baby dressed up like an Eskimo eating water chestnuts in that basket thing?  Are the animals sitting around cause they want to eat the straw in JC's bed...or do they want to eat JC? If they ate JC would that be considered a holy sacrifice in the animal kingdom or just Christ(mas) dinner?



So, this one looks pretty accurate too...only they don't have any faces and they're all white people and some little girl (at least I think it's a little girl) is playing the piano, which I'm pretty sure hadn't been invented yet.  What's the deal with Eeyore on the left?  I sure as hell know he wasn't invented yet!



Okay, this one is my favorite...not only do they not have faces, they are made of toilet paper and I believe Mary is holding Baby-JC cause a couple of those "wise men" have clubs and knives and look like they're going to mess with Baby-JC.  They're probably Tea-Party Republicans.  Wait, didn't the Eskimos have clubs too?  Weird.



I don't even know where to begin with this one.  I'm pretty sure that JC is fake.  The little wise guy has his pajama bottoms on his head and the oldest girl never changed out of her Halloween costume.  The girl playing Mary looks like one of those kids with that old person disease where you age like 10 years for every year.  The kid on the left is the creepy neighborhood kid that brought along his hobblie-horse thing that he probably dry humps when he thinks nobody is looking...

Anyway, I don't know why I got on to that subject cause that's not why I started this thing...I received a See's catalog in the mail and was fingering through it...


See the rocket guy?  What on earth does he have to do with delivering with care?  That is not the picture I would have picked.  Maybe a little black mommy cat holding her baby in her mouth.  Or maybe an Eskimo carrying a club in one hand and a baby seal in the other...



and this one; Christmas cheer is here? Where in the world is Christmas cheer represented by a bugle?  Where's the cocktail or that gross Andre sparkling wine crap?  Bells!...now if there were bells, I might think of Christmas cheer.  I'm not sure why, but I would.  If Mary See was alive, she'd be pissed.

Happy Holidays...

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

I bring you...

The 8th Wonder of the World:

SAUSAGEHENGE!!


Or...really big fat cooked fingers with a side of grilled zucchini! NOM!!

I became a great Auntie over the weekend.  Nephew-Lucas and Niece-Kelly-Lucas are proud parents of Evee!





Evee, bless her heart, isn't sleeping through the night yet...


Later.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

I am such a jerk!

This is the door to our area (that would be mine and BK's).


It looks like a normal door and it is, accept for the stoopid lock on the door.  When you shut the door, the door automatically locks and then it's really hard to unlock. I know I could call and put a work order in and the locksmith guy would come to fix it, but this lock has been nothing but trouble and I don't want to bug the locksmith guy about it.  I'm not even sure why we need a lock on the door to begin with.  Besides, we didn't even have a doorknob on the door for the first six months after we moved in.

Anyway, I leave the door open so there aren't any problems...until yesterday.  It's not even a big deal, really.  When I came to work yesterday, after being gone for two weeks, the door was closed and yes, locked.  Right away, a little twinge of panic set in cause I knew I was going to have to spend the next ten minutes playing with the lock.  So, I did.

Then today, I get to the parking lot and I'm already stressing about the door being locked.  Sure enough, it's locked.  I figure the janitor is doing it.  I figure, maybe that's how they remember they cleaned an office...they shut the door when they are done.  Seems reasonable only, I don't want the door shut.

Now I spend the next few minutes contemplate letting the building manager know about the shut door and how I don't want it shut cause of the stoopid lock.  I know if I have that conversation, she's going to wonder why I don't put in a work order for the lock...blah, blah, blah...

So, I come to the conclusion, I'll just leave the key in the door and deal with it cause I really don't want to tell the building manager that I don't want the door shut cause of the stoopid lock and that I'm too lazy to deal with it...and how would the janitor feel if they get told not to shut the door?  Bet they'd think I'm being an ass and OCD for wanting the door open anyway.  It's just a stoopid door!

I stopped thinking about it and went on to think about more important stuff...like what I was going to do for dinner?

I swear, no sooner did I drop the thought when a guy came walking in my area.  He introduced himself.  He's from the janitorial company and let me know we have a new janitor and was everything alright...

COD-DUH, it just came spilling out of my mouth about the stoopid lock and that I wanted the door left open...and as the shit is coming out of my mouth I'm thinking how I sound like a complete entitled jerk...so I start back-peddling "No, really don't bother mentioning it to the new person.  It's not a big deal...but if maybe he/she could leave the door open, but really, it's not a big deal...I'm not sure why I'm even bringing it up...it's just the lock is sticky..." Now I can't shut my mouth to save myself.  He's looking at me like I'm crazy-cat-lady or something.

Then he asks me if everything else is okay like carpets and garbage.  Yeah, so crazy-cat-lady starts going overboard with how well the garbage gets picked up...oh, and maybe that's why the janitor shuts the door so they know they emptied the garbage in my office...oh, and how so sorry I am when I put composting in the recycling can and recycling in the garbage can, and then I feel the need to tell him I'm one of the composting stewards...Now he's got that she's-a-crazy-cat-lady-serial-killer look on his face again.

Then he ran out of here.  I'm surprised I didn't chase after him with my garbage cans.

COD-DUH!!

Oh, we're having steak and salad for dinner.

Monday, November 4, 2013

Ever heard of lamb breast?

I hadn't.  Not until we went to a winery in Lake County that also has their own happy lamb for sale.  It's called a breast, but it's really little lamb riblets...and are they good!

First you put those ribbies in a dutch oven with some garlic, dry white wine and cinnamon.  Cover with water and bring it to an almost boil.  Then they go into a 285 degree oven.  Since I have an oven that isn't digital, my choices were 275 or 300 so I got as close as I could.  They stayed in the oven for 2 hours.  Are you wondering why it's cooked at 285?  That's because the recipe was for a C oven instead of an F oven so Mathematics-Poppy had to do the conversion.



Then came the BBQ sauce.  That had some tomato sauce, balsamic vinegar, salt, garlic powder, brown sugar and probably some other junk I can't remember.


Took them out of the oven and then GrillMasta-Poppy took over.  Out on the grill they went, along with some veggies...


Just a little NOM!

Here's what it looked like in Virginia last week:



We went and hung out with Poppy's clan.  We pretty much ate NOM NOM food and I mostly sat around.  Honey-Do-Poppy and Brother-Bill kept themselves busy playing with electronicals most of the time.  Made me want to poke myself in the eyeball...more than a lot!

Ever get an ingrown hair/pimple thing in your armpit?  Freakin hurts!

Check this out...me, Hunter-Gatherer-Poppy and Cabin-Fever-Jax took a little walk on the beach.  We saw a seagull fighting with something so we went to investigate...

Dinner!


So, I think the reason I don't blog very much anymore is because this blog site has become more and more difficult to navigate.  I don't know what's causing it, but I'm going to search around for a different blog site.

Later!