Wednesday, April 23, 2014

I have gas!

No, not that kind of gas...not right this moment anyway.  The petroleum product kind of gas.

My story begins shortly after we moved to the Outerlands.  I was going to the 76 station closest to the house up until about 2 years ago I went in to get petrol and Mr. Attendant-Guy hadn't unlocked the pumps.  I asked if he was open and he got all huffy.  So...that gas station is dead to me.

Now I go to the 76 station by Old Great Highway and Lincoln.  A couple of weeks ago, I made my weekly stop at said gas station.  When I pulled the nozzle off the pump thing, gas started spewing all over the place.  Mostly on my hands.  I wrestled the hose into my gas tank hole trying not to pour the crap all over my scooter...but I did.  Once I'd finished pouring gas all over the place and trying to clean it up, I go to see Mr. Attendant-Guy to tell him his nozzle is leaking.  He looks at me with a blank stare.  So I say "No, really, it's leaking all over the place and I feel like I'm going to spontaneously combust!"  He walks out to look at the nozzle and has me point to where it's leaking.  He says "Hose" and walks away.  So...this gas station is dead to me too.

I tell Poppy about my trials and she says "Where are you going to get your gas now that all the gas stations are dead to you?" I replied "I'm going to walk."

Okay, so today I reluctantly go to the spewing gas gas station to fill up. Just to be safe, I go to a different pump.  I take out my card and start pressing all the buttons. I'm getting ready to "Remove Nozzle" but instead the machine says "SEE CASHIER".  Huh?  I guess I entered my zip code wrong or something.  I go through the process again and get the same error.  Oh kiss my butt!

I go in to SEE CASHIER.  I say "The pump says SEE CASHIER".  She goes "___________".  Yeah, she just stared at me.  WTF?  I go "What do you think I ought to do?"  She says "Not me, it's machine."  Whatever!  For shits-n-grins, I drive over to another pump (no, not the squirting one) and try again.  Same SEE CASHIER stupid message.

I'm outta there.  Thing is, I'm on E and the next gas station I can think of is another 76 up on Geary.  Yeah, I made it and I got my goddamn gas!

Now I'm wondering why are there so many 76 gas stations here?  Are they all owned by the same weirdo family that has a creepy staring problem?  Just for fun, I went on my Internets.

Check out the Supermodel video:

At first I was offended, then I realized it was kind of a joke, but I don't think it's funny.  Must be my mood.

Why is it whenever I write this blog, I always feel like I need to post pics?


She's the cutest little thing ever!

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