A real live rubber band ball from Co-Worker-Friend-Family-Member-Laurie!
And from Co-Worker-Friend-Drea:
BINDER CLIPS!! How much better can my working life be? Not much!
Yesterday, Financial-Poppy and I went to have physical exams for two additional life insurance policies. This way, if either one of us kicks off, the other can stay in the house without much $$$ trouble. Peace of mind, I say! We parked the car and Halitosis-Poppy wanted to stop into Walgreens for some gum cause she'd just ate a piece of cheese. I was all about getting to the appointment cause I figured there would be paperwork so I went on ahead.
I go into the office and the gal takes me in right away. What I quickly deduce is that the gal is a new nurse. I'm not sure if you recall, but I've got bad veins when it comes to bloodletting and I can just about pass out if I detect incompetence or a lack of confidence in the bloodletter. I asked the gal if she was the one who would be performing all the tests and she said "Yes." I let her know that I'm a fainter with the blood thing and I have crappy veins. I tell her to save her trouble, angst and me from passing out, she should just go ahead and get The-Blood-Of-Kelly from my hand. She had a weird look on her face and said "Um, okay." First beads of sweat are now forming on my forehead and upper lip.
Moving on...the exam consists of three blood pressure readings; you know I've got that white-coat hypertension (I know, I'm a wreck when it comes to medical stuff) so when I go to the doctors, my BP is always elevated. But since they changed my meds, I've been doing great. My readings were 125/80, 130/70 and 120/80. Then I gave them a wee-wee sample in a cup. Always fun, especially if my aim is spot on. Then an EKG, which I assume was normal.
By this time, the other very experienced nurse had come in and was helping the less experienced nurse. This made me feel better. I asked if the EKG looked okay. She said she couldn't really say, but she knew I wasn't having a heart attack.
Now the moment I'd been dreading; the bloodletting. I was already laying down on the table so I stayed put. My back is starting to sweat and I'm feeling very tired. Less-Experienced-Nurse started prepping all the bottles and needle stuff. The More-Experienced-Nurse started telling her about the veins in the hand and how you have to go above the hand away from the end of the trunk of the vein.
As I'm writing this, I have to sit down cause I'm getting light headed.
So Less-Experienced-Nurse starts working on my right hand. She gets the needle in, but More-Experience-Nurse says "Uh oh, she's really slow to bleed." I'm starting to sweat more now. Then More-Experienced-Nurse takes over and says something about letting gravity do the work, so she tries to take my hand and move it down off the table...Oopsie, the needle slipped out. Now my tummy is starting to hurt.
While I could still speak, I did reassure LE-Nurse that it's me, not her and that I was sorry she had to start her day this way.
Then ME-Nurse goes over to my left hand and proclaims "There's a juicy one over here!" She asks LE-Nurse if she'd like to try again. She replies "No, that's okay, I'd rather watch." Whew! Time for the second bloodletting...She nailed it and the blood started to flow. Well, I'm really ready to go night-night so I tell them "I'm feeling a little light headed." ME-Nurse says "I'm just about done. Breath in through your nose and exhale through your mouth to a count of 5 and keep doing it." I'm doing this, but it's just making it all worse. I'm now sweating profusely and my glasses are fogging up.
I ask for a glass of water; LE-Nurse goes out to the water cooler, comes back in and says there are no cups. ME-Nurse said "Oh, right, we just ran out." I can barely talk and suggest I might use and wee-wee cup, preferably a clean one. I get my water but now I have to lay there for an eternity until my BP comes back to normal. After the second bloodletting, ME-Nurse took my BP and it was a 95/50 or something close to death. So not fun...
As you all know, yesterday was Valentines Day. Usually on Valentines Day and our anniversary, Hallmark-Holiday-Poppy and I will celebrate with nice dinner at home of Ribeye steak, veg and a really nice bottle of wine. Since starting the low-carb gig, just about every night is a special dinner so that didn't sound appealing. Also, we had been so immersed in project land and having Dad over the weekend, we'd not given much thought to VD.
After the bloodletting and we returned to the office, I sent Decision-Maker-Poppy an email asking her if we should do something special for VD. Her reply was "Should we? Sushi?" After all, Depression-Era-Poppy and I have Groupons for Osaka Sushi. Why we can save $25 on our dinna! Given the traumatic experience I just had, I needed a reward and this just sounded so good...
Here's Jalopy-Poppy driving Miss. Fainty to the dinna. Isn't it weird how when I take Depression-Era-Poppy's picture it looks like...well...like it was taken in the Depression era?
Chow!
No comments:
Post a Comment